[S] Early Development

After my exams, I will be trying to revamp my blog. Some things that I hope to do:

• Use a better layout (gonna ask the gf to help =X Wonder if she will haha)
• Update the sidebar ---->
• Add labels to as many (if possible, all) of my posts as possible. (e.g. humor, school, TV, etc)

I really love blogging, just that with Twitter and Facebook as more convenient alternatives (Twitter you can just microblog, and Facebook you just upload the photos and add captions, whereas in the past I would add photos and write stuff in a blog entry) it's hard to overcome the lazy nature in me to actually write a blog entry.

Anyway, I'm starting this new thing of 'mini blogs', which is something like a short thought I had that is too long to be expressed on Twitter. Yes, I know Twitlonger can probably accomplish the same thing, but I kinda want them to be archivable. These posts will be recognizable by the [S] in front of the title, meaning 'Short/small'.



Studying Developmental Psychology has made me think a lot about my own upbringing, from when I was a child to a teenager. I didn't have the most ideal circumstances - my dad passed away when I was 7 and my mum was hospitalized multiple times for depression.

Reading about the importance of attachment and effective parenting has made me realize why my relationship with my family/mom isn't the best now. The absence of a secure attachment + effective parenting leads to irreversible changes - no matter how hard I (or my mother tries) now, it just isn't the same.

A classic example : Scientific research discourages the use of physical punishment (e.g. caning) in child discipline, mainly because it models aggressive behavior and promotes aggression as the solution for problems.
My mother caned me regularly as a child (not really her fault, I was one hell of a mischevious kid =X ), and this led me to develop as an aggressive kid, at least in the mind. I watched and enjoyed WWF/WWE (wrestling), and often had pretty aggressive thoughts, though it didn't manifest in my overt behavior.... apart from one aspect - I react quite hostile-ly to my mother.

This means frequent heated arguments when I will be shouting at her and I get irritated pretty easily by her, more than I am proud of. It's not like I intentionally want to or I'm not trying to be more patient - I am - but it's just a natural reflexive tendency to snap or lash out when she nags/scolds etc. Yes, I think it's a result of my childhood.
Note that I'm NOT adopting a defeatist attitude in this though, I'm still praying for strength to improve my self-control, patience, and trying to be a better son.

What is the point of saying all this? Well my personal experience has made me realize the importance of good parenting and good child-rearing practices, and thus I vow to be an excellent father in the future.
I am tucking away all the tidbits of information I pick up when studying the Child Psychology textbook, and reminding myself constantly about the need to be a firm but warm, responsive parent, sensitive to my child's needs, and to provide a loving and supportive environment for my family to develop.


P.S. Sorry, this turned out much longer than I expected, it was a 'short' post in my head but when I penned it down it somehow.. multiplied. lolol.